


What Comes First

by miss_Splendora



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Awkward Carlos, But he learns, Carlos is not good in relationships, Cecil Is Not Described, Episode: e031 A Blinking Light Up On The Mountain, Established Relationship, Light Angst, M/M, POV Carlos, Pre-Episode: e035 Lazy Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-23
Updated: 2015-01-23
Packaged: 2018-03-08 19:22:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3220538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miss_Splendora/pseuds/miss_Splendora
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dating Cecil was not at all what Carlos was expecting. It turned out to be just as terrifying as anything in Night Vale but for reasons Carlos had not anticipated.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Comes First

Dating Cecil was not at all what Carlos was expecting. It turned out to be just as terrifying as anything in Night Vale but for reasons Carlos had not anticipated.

“Sorry, sweetie, I'm tied up at the lab,” he'd said into the phone last night when Cecil called him worried to ask why he was an hour late to their dinner date. “The house that doesn't exist is giving us trouble now that people are walking out of it and through my team. You understand, right?”

“I do, of course, but...” Cecil had said over the phone, clearly not understanding the importance of discovering what his ex-intern was doing there exactly and where she was now. “It's not going to destroy us all tonight, will it?”

“Well, not as far as we can tell for now but all the new data...”

Okay, he would lie if he said he was not prepared to be surprised when he asked Cecil out on their first date. As a scientist in Night Vale he made sure to keep letting himself be surprised by little things. Sure, the Glow Clouds, the nonexistent houses, or the broken clocks were all obvious study subjects, but he needed to keep an eye on the infected trash, on the troubled tarantula community, on little signs of anatomical anomalies and the strangely artistic weather as well. He could not allow himself to become blasé about anything if he wanted to understand this fascinating place fully.

“So why do you have to skip our date tonight to study it?” Cecil had asked over the phone last night and Carlos didn't have a good answer.

“I...” Carlos had stuttered into his phone, not certain if he could say the right thing. “I am a scientist, you know,” he'd managed, hoping Cecil would understand – betting everything on Cecil understanding.

He was a scientist first, it influenced everything he did. He knew he could be intense about science and he knew some people could get tired of it very quickly. But in Night Vale he was, quite officially, Carlos the Scientist. That was who he was not only in his mind, that was who he was to the whole town. He doubted anyone in there even knew his last name because nobody ever needed it to identify him. Science was his occupation and it was his family, and it was Who He Was. Hell, after over a year, Carlos sometimes caught himself forgetting what his full name was, exactly, because he felt “The Scientist” actually described him perfectly.

And he knew Cecil saw that in him, from the first day, and adored Carlos for the part of his personality that had so often been mocked in the past. And so Carlos embraced it whole heartedly, never even leaving the house without his lab coat, just feeling comfortable with himself.

He also knew, of course, that Cecil was head-over-heels in love. That was hardly news – or, since it was being reported in the news segment, maybe it actually was news? Anyway, the whole town knew exactly how Cecil felt about Carlos. That was not a secret and Carlos felt honestly flattered, if a little bewildered by such openness on Cecil's part.

“Oh,” Cecil had said rather coldly over the phone, utterly confusing Carlos. “So you are just putting science before me tonight,” he'd stated matter-of-factually.

It's not like Carlos hadn't been interested in Cecil sooner, either, it's just that there had always been so much science to be done around. There would be time, he'd always figured, for personal life later. Cecil was not going anywhere, Cecil was patient, and Carlos was going to call him finally, honestly, as soon as he'd finished that experiment, as he'd summed up the data, as he'd composed the report, as he'd consulted his colleagues, as he'd came back from that research trip...

And then he went to the Desert Flower _Bowling Alley_ and _Fun Complex_ and was ambushed by the most ridiculous of threats, a miniature city of all things, and was really, seriously wounded, and he should have been prepared, should have not been _surprised._ He'd promised himself not to become blasé and the first time he dismissed a danger it hurt him badly enough that people thought he would die and Cecil mourned him on air. Carlos finally reached the conclusion that maybe Cecil would wait but there was a chance that Carlos might actually be properly dead by the time he finds a moment to just call him. He just wanted to see him before that happened.

And he'd promised himself,  _really_ promised himself, to not be surprised by anything. He expected Cecil to be just as adoring and adorable as always once Carlos expressed he was, in fact, interested, too, but then again – it was Night Vale. From what he knew, Cecil might have meant that his hair was perfect for a ritual sacrifice all this time. It was highly unlikely, but he was determined not to be surprised.

And then he did not know what to think about the cold tone over the phone.

“Well... No, I... I'll be there in 20 minutes,” Carlos had said, glancing at his latest experiment brewing. It would take him more time if he wanted to see it to the end. “An hour, max!” Probably more, if he wanted to also note down the results, and maybe change for the date...

He'd always assumed Cecil would wait. Wonderful, patient, adoring Cecil who thought Carlos was perfect. Who idolized him in public and always seemed to know his boundaries when they actually met in person. Cecil, his anchor to reality, his local emergency contact, always so eager to help him and please him and praise him. It was too easy for Carlos to just take Cecil's words at face value and believe he could do no wrong, and Cecil would understand.

Cecil made Carlos feel comfortable with himself, and Carlos never questioned it.

“Don't bother,” Cecil had said in a voice so steady and cold it froze blood in Carlos' veins. “The dinner is cold already, anyway. Just focus on your science.” And Cecil had hung up before Carlos could say anything.

Dating Cecil was not what Carlos had expected. He expected abundant public displays of affection, a flood of cutesy texts, being tagged in Cecil's Facebook relationship status after a tsunami of mentions on his wall, lots of gushing over Carlos on the local community radio and general adoration. Not all of which Carlos would be 100% comfortable with but nothing he could not handle. At worst, they would just need to teach Cecil to control himself, he had thought when he asked Cecil to dinner.

Carlos made the crucial mistake of believing that being perfect meant he would not need to work at his relationship.

And really, it's not like he didn't care about Cecil. He thought, occasionally, about surprises for him, or what they could do over the weekend, or texted Cecil with some interesting science he encountered, not only as news for his show but also for Cecil's personal amusement. He shared all the best cat videos with Cecil, he paid attention to what Cecil said on the radio, and over dinner, and over late night cup of coffee, and in their bed, and it all seemed good.

It's just that he would not do those things all the time. Just because he had a boyfriend did not mean that he was not The Scientist all of a sudden. And so he let one date slip without a call when he got fascinating readings off his danger meter. Cecil called him, eventually, worried sick that Carlos had been snatched by the librarians to actually assist with the Summer Reading Program but seemed to accept Carlos' apologies – he was doing science, sorry, Cecil, let me make it up to you. And Cecil didn't sound upset, he understood, after all, about who Carlos was. But then it happened again, and again, and again.

It had never occurred to him he would be the one needing a lesson on acceptable boyfriend behavior.

But he was a scientist. He could learn and study – that was literally his job.

So now he was standing in front of Cecil's apartment, flowers in his hand, his heart in his throat, knocking on his boyfriend's door somehow with nothing but hope.

“I am here for personal reasons!” he blurted out when the door opened. Behind them was Cecil, calm and composed as always, in the most ridiculous pajamas Carlos had ever seen. “These are for you and there is nothing scientific about them, they are just pretty like your face! This is what, scientifically, they have in common with the situation!” he said quickly, pushing the flowers in Cecil's direction. His boyfriend raised his eyebrows and crossed arms on his chest.

Dating Cecil took effort. Carlos had not anticipated that. He had been expecting, he was ashamed to admit, an easy relationship. He'd expected puppy love and unconditional acceptance.

“Can I come in?” he asked sheepishly, still holding out the flowers. “I just want to make it up to you for yesterday.”

He had not anticipated feeling this vulnerable and terrified to see anything but happiness on another person's face. He had not anticipated he would cause Cecil any pain. He had not anticipated the cold sweat of fear he was facing, waiting for an answer to a simple question.

Cecil took the flowers, mercifully, and let Carlos in. When they closed the door to his small apartment, there was an awkward silence.

“Well,” Cecil said finally, putting the flowers in a vase. “Will you finally say it, or will we be standing here all day?”

“Will I finally say what?”

Cecil looked at him and raised his eyebrows slightly higher.

“Will you say you are sorry? This is why you came here, right?”

And that was the thing with Cecil. He always knew what to say, when to say it, how to say it, and when to keep quiet, too. Cecil had given him time to figure out what Carlos wanted out of life, and now he was not giving him space to make silly mistakes. Cecil understood emotions and words and communication on a level Carlos could not hope to even begin to comprehend.

“I am. Sorry. Cecil, really, I didn't think...”

“What did you think, Carlos?”

Carlos stared at Cecil – not angry, just disappointed, the worst thing a loved one can be, just watching and waiting. Waiting for Carlos to be honest. With all that's been said and done, what could he do but give him that?

“I thought you would wait,” Carlos said.

Cecil stared at him, clearly thinking it over.

“Will you always just keep me waiting, Carlos? Because if you do...”

And there it was.

There was Cecil not letting Carlos hurt him and distancing himself from this disastrous relationship.

There was the ultimate proof Carlos _was_ the jerk here and probably always had been.

He was really unprepared to deal with it and before he could come up with the right response, his phone called. He glanced at the screen. Rochelle. “I need to take this,” he said and answered the phone, briefly noticing the pained expression on Cecil's face. “What do you mean there is a mountain outside of town now? Mountains do now just spontaneously... Yes, I know where we live, but still there need to be _rules_ and...” his voice trailed off when he caught the sight of Cecil again.

The sight of a sad Cecil, looking at him with a piercing gaze, fiddling with his fingers. Carlos may have been dense, but he knew that look. This uncomfortable “maybe we should see other people or science, in your case, Carlos,” look. He had seen it so many times.

He had never expected to see it on Cecil's face. He had never expected to be a bad boyfriend to Cecil.

“Will it kill us tonight? Or tomorrow?” Carlos asked over the phone, looking at Cecil carefully. His boyfriend's face lit up slightly with hope and that was all he needed to see. “So we will deal with it then,” he said and hung up.

Cecil was smiling at Carlos and that made putting science away more than worth it.

“So you said you wanted to make it up to me?” Cecil said, just like that pushing the argument aside, understanding the unsaid. Carlos just smiled and nodded.

“How about I make you a dinner tomorrow? Science be damned, it can wait a day.”

Cecil smiled even wider, and that was all Carlos needed at this moment. He knew it was a temporary fix but he knew now what needed fixing. He knew he could do it.

“You are more important to me than science,” he said, really hoping to mean it.

Because if there was someone, anyone, who Carlos could see surpassing science in his mind, it would be Cecil. Only Cecil. Wonderful, patient, insightful Cecil, who will teach him to be a better person in all the ways he would not think of on his own.

“I'm also fine with a tie for the first place in your heart,” Cecil said. “If you chose me over science just sometimes, that will be more than enough.”

“I will,” Carlos said and kissed his boyfriend.

Dating in Night Vale was not what he expected. He expected eldritch abominations, unspoken horror, some deadly threats, maybe an unexpected numbers of members in someone's pants or tentacles or something like that. Instead, he found a balanced relationship with a man so confident and understanding, and still in love with him, that he could hardly believe his own luck.

If the price for that was to put something else besides science first sometimes... He would be a jerk to complain.

**Author's Note:**

> And this is how Carlos learned to put other things than science first.
> 
> This is unbeta'd and I am positive I have mixed up past tenses. This is what you get for writing in your second language. If you see any mistakes, please let me know!
> 
> Any comments are welcome <3


End file.
